Interview: Rarely Asked Questions – Lloyd Langford: Page 2 of 2

6. What do your parents think of your job?

They’ve always been incredibly supportive. No complaints at all. Oh, okay then. One minor complaint. When my mother kindly booked me into a B&B for my first time at Edinburgh fringe, I wish she’d (a) checked the proximity of Musselburgh to Edinburgh and (b) not accidentally booked me and my then girlfriend into somewhere that wouldn’t allow two unmarried people to share a bed and also had a compulsory breakfast. A compulsory breakfast! The landlady kept banging on our door until we capitulated and came downstairs. A very strange policy. No pre-marital banging but mandatory eggs.

7. What’s the worst thing about being a comedian?

The worst thing is the same as the best thing. Having to spend time with other comedians. It really depends on who you get.

8. I think you are very good at what you do (that’s why I’m asking these questions). What do you think of you?

I’m alright. I try and turn over new material pretty regularly, I gig a lot and I vary between live stuff, radio & TV and writing work so I don’t feel creatively stagnant. On the downside, I really do need deadlines to push up against and maybe I should be more ambitious. But then I see ruthlessly ambitious comedians on social media and they make me want to judo chop myself to death.

 

9. How much do you earn and how much would you like to earn?

Has anyone ever given a straight answer to this one?! (editor's note - a few have, most notably Alfie Brown  – not much – and Katy Brand – sometimes loads) I know that I won’t. I earn a living from writing and performing comedy. Which I’m very grateful for. I also receive a monthly stipend from Ivo Graham. As well as that, he occasionally invites me around to his estate and lets me frolic around in the grounds.

10. How important is luck in terms of career success – have you had lucky breaks?

Luck helps, I think. I first met Simon Amstell because we were flyering together on the Royal Mile and from that he came to see an Edinburgh show I did and from that he asked me to write for him on Never Mind The Buzzcocks. I think The Police guitarist Andy Summers wrote a memoir called “One Train Later” about how if he had been on one train later on a particular day he’d never have met Sting. So it’s not all good luck, either.

11. Alan Davies has said that comedians fall into two categories -golfers and self-harmers. The former just get on with life, the latter
are tortured artists. Which are you – or do you think you fit into a third category?

I’m a crazy golfer. I get on with life but, through no fault of my own, I do sometimes find myself trapped in the inner mechanisms of a windmill.

12. Who is your favourite person ever and why – not including family or friends or other comedians?

Ooh, it’s tough not to give a really wanky answer for this. I’d say, anyone who has made the world a more interesting and better place through their art. And that runs the gamut from Sister Rosetta Tharpe to Neil Buchanan.

13. Do you keep your drawers tidy and if not why not? (please think long and hard about this question, it's to settle an argument with my girlfriend. The future of our relationship could depend on your response).

I keep my drawers tidy. I don’t see the point of compartmentalising mess. I also own too many pairs of socks. Do you need any socks, Bruce? They’re mainly black but a few stripeys in there too. Let me know.

 

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