Interview: Rarely Asked Questions – Marcel Lucont

Marcel Lucont

Fresh from a smash hit Edinburgh Fringe 2014, and direct from filming his first BBC3 pilot, everyone’s favourite French flâneur, raconteur and bon-viveur Marcel Lucont is currently on tour, mixing  stand-up, songs and poetry with a dash of visual trickery. Beyond The Joke asked him to put down his vin rouge for a moment and answer some questions.

 

 

 

 

 

 

What is the last thing you do before going on stage? 

In a perfect world, the three 'F's - food, fan mail and fellatio (in all three cases, receiving rather than giving), but of course the world is not perfect, especially when the constricting boundaries of my world are currently the shores of the still-somehow-United Kingdom, in which I shall be touring from September to November. The latter 'F' can be particularly difficult to ensure sometimes, even in towns such as "Maidenhead," whose name promised so much, yet delivered so little. 

What irritates you?

Persons in a rush to get somewhere. Why? Some say there are not enough hours in a day, this is untrue, there are far too many I believe. This is why British women feel they have time to remove their eyebrows and draw their own on, or why sport exists. If most of these idiots stopped and questioned whether what they are rushing towards will further humanity, or their own soul, perhaps they would stop, lie down and read some literature instead. 

What is the most dangerous thing you have ever done? 

Your mother. 

What is the most stupid thing you have ever done? 

Well, if I may resist the obvious and arguably repetitive response, I can recall a recent experience which still haunts me, whereby, during a show, I levelled an accusation at a man of covering his thoughts with his choice of words, a quote I attributed to Camus, when it was of course Voltaire, the horror of which only dawned on me while making love that night. There had been a palpable change of mood in the room after this utterance, and it was only half an hour later that I realised why. I still cringe to recall it, but am man enough to admit it to you. 

What has surprised you most during your career in comedy? 

That, as a man holding up a mirror to the myriad miserable shortcomings of a place's inferior culture, inhabitants and/or cuisine, I am repeatedly asked to return, to increasingly sizeable audiences each time. It would be some recompense to discover my words had ever changed the status quo there, but instead the lucrative income from it will just have to suffice.

What do your parents/children (delete as applicable) think of your job?

I did not realise one could simply delete applicable children. This is worth bearing in mind for the future. My mother is currently in Los Angeles, so far as I know, shacked up with an American lawyer, so her opinion of my artistry holds little relevance to me. My father joined the Great Orgy In The Sky some years ago, so I suppose the same holds true of his opinion also.

What’s the worst thing about being a comedian?

I imagine it is having me on the scene, reminding them that there is a higher being out there, a raconteur, a humourist, a chanteur, a poet, a flâneur, an oracle, all in one.

I think you are very good at what you do (that’s why I’m asking these questions). What do you think of you?

Well you only see a fraction of what I do, I am fortunate enough to see it every night. Having done so over a period of many years, I feel I am in a genuine position to say there are none better.

How much do you earn?

Ah, there it is, that typically crass British assessment of an art form. I shall say this: enough to pay for my vices, not enough to pay for a man to permanently pursue impertinent journalists. Yet.

How important is luck in terms of career success – have you had lucky breaks?

To paraphrase Jean Cocteau, there must be luck, or else how can those who dislike us explain our success? Personally I have seen good luck, I have seen bad luck, I have drunk my way through both and emerged successful regardless. May it continue that way...

Marcel Lucont is currently touring. Details ici.

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