6. What do your parents/children (delete as applicable) think of your job?
Everyone loves me and thinks I'm great. I mean seriously who cares? Who does what their parents want? It's not the 1950s and I don't have to please them for a giant inheritance.
If you asked my mum 10/15 years ago she would have said I should marry a footballer, but now she likes that I do this. Although sometimes she gets afraid when I'm very outspoken. Earlier this year I wrote a piece for the Guardian about having a termination at 17 and she was following it online. She said 'I worry, people are saying threatening things, maybe you've said enough about that now' and I say nah...
7. What’s the worst thing about being a comedian?
We are insufferable people sometimes, self important and hard to be around. Also we like tautologies....
I mean it's fine when I'm like that but other comedians ? No way (giggly emoji).
8. I think you are very good at what you do (that’s why I’m asking these questions). What do you think of you?
I think on my day I can be brilliant. When I'm at my best I'm doing social, political and personal. When I'm not at my best there is polemic and self-indulgence. My mood tends to oscillate wildly between Sylvia Plath and Beyonce with no middle ground whatsoever. I'm either the sexy woman who can conquer the world or am solitary and want to stick my head in an oven. I think I'm ok, at times I absolutely hate being in this head then sometimes I'm so in love with myself that I would totally go out with me.
9. How much do you earn and how much would you like to earn?
Not as much as the guys (winky-face emoji). I'm doing ok but I'd like to be doing even better. I don't own a property but that could be because I was born and raised in London and I might as well buy an effing luxury liner.
10. How important is luck in terms of career success – have you had lucky breaks?
Yes I've had a few but I'm a firm believer in making your own luck. There are quite a lot of cliques in comedy ....whether it's critics, bookers, promoters or agents. It's a bit shit to learn how much of an effect that has, even when you've benefited from it. So that's why you have to plough your own furrow so to speak.
11. Alan Davies has said that comedians fall into two categories - golfers and self-harmers. The former just get on with life, the latter are tortured artists. Which are you – or do you think you fit into a third category?
The Sylvia Plath crossed with Beyonce category
12. Who is your favourite person ever and why – not including family or friends or other comedians?
Do I know anyone outside of that category anymore? I HAVE SO MANY FRIENDS!
So if it's no one I know or am friends with then Maya Angelou for the beautiful words and the spirit and the compassion and Stevie Nicks for the awesome vocals and stories of rock and roll legend
13. Do you keep your drawers tidy and if not why not? (please think long and hard about this question, it's to settle an argument with my girlfriend. The future of our relationship could depend on your response).
They are either immaculate or a shit pit. If I do a tidy then I have to do every last bit and file books alphabetically. Drawer liners would go in and I've been known to use separators. Again I am a person of extremes. I'd go with 80% of the time it's a shit pit. Because I'm busy and I don't subscribe to the idea that a woman should be neat, tidy and unflawed. Or I'm lazy...you decide.
Tiff Stevenson: Bombshell is at Gilded Balloon Teviot from Aug 2 - 27. Tickets here.
